Finally They Rescued Those Thai Children!

Now I can fuckin’ rip on them.

Thank your God that none of these little fucks died or else I would’ve waited until tomorrow to post this. I’m sorry my capacity for compassion cannot outreach commen sense. I cannot pity stupidity. Please tell me what the fuck that coach was doing, thinking he could bring a bunch of toddlers into a lightless cave and nothing bad would happen. Not only that but the coach clearly didn’t have a firm grasp on how sea levels can change. Cave exploring is a dumb dangerous idea and I know that from Planet Earth and Over the Hedge. They all easily could’ve been walking into the moist mouth of an Alaskan Bull Worm or something, but their chaperone wouldn’t have known. This dirty Mr. Rogers brought twelve young boys into a dark cave with literally no supplies and somehow that’s not the pressing issue. And to top it off the kids were all telling his coach that they forgave him and/or didn’t pass any blame to begin with. Uhhhh fake news alert the World Cup Quarterfinals were on which is all these kids have for entertainment. If I missed kick off to suck my coaches dick I would’ve committed murder suicide.

“Wait Bcal, don’t you feel anything for these chidren who have been stuck in squalid for days.” Nah san, these untrained circus monkeys have escaped from my SCJohnson compound and are trying to have alternative naturistic fun. Should’ve killed them and promoted their worst enemies to 55 cents a day. No shot I will not feel bad for this classic news story of people doing things they are not qualified for and the world crying when they get injured or worse. Oh no free diving ameteur dies from blood poisoning, duh. Little kid drowns after breaking into the neighbors house for a night swim, that aint your house boo boo. Everyone stay in your dam lane. I don’t even fuck with heights because I’m not a master of gravity or having wings. Humans constantly try to shove their ingenuity into the faces of God and Mother Nature. Literally the cockiest bullshit you can do. Lets go higher, lets go deeper, lets go further. All great quips about exploration and intuition, but terrible headlines for Thai children.

‘Lets go home’ is that shit i preach. Im so fucking safe indoors with my cigs its unfathomable. Pce.

About Bcal

My name is Bcal, but you can call me Brandon. I write differently than everyone else here. You will like it.

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